The Smirking Chimp just cracks me up today.
Lo and behold these two examples:
Democrats, as my crusty old country uncle used to say, "don't know whether to shit or go blind -- so they walk around all day with one-eye closed, farting."
(From this thread.)
My ten-year-old granddaughter looked up from her science homework the other day and posed me a question she thought would be a real stumper.
"Grampa, what's the world's largest invertebrate life form?"
"That would be the Democratic Party," I replied. "Why do you ask?"
"Because my science book says it's the ‘giant squid.’ They can weigh up to 600 pounds."
Upon hearing this stupefying factoid, I was forced to concede.
"Then I guess your science book is probably correct, sweetheart. Even loaded down with frozen blocks of corporate campaign cash, most Democrats don't weigh that much!"
(From Fun Facts About Invertebrates.)