Let Love Be Your Energy
Sexual Healing, Baby, Is Good For Me

If You Could Read My Mind, Love, What A Tale My Thoughts Could Tell

A friend alerts me to the fact that my RSS feed is not working. He's maybe the fifth or seventh person in the last two months to tell me this.

Yes, I acknowledge. I know it's not working. I turned it off, actually.

At which point - understandably, really - the question comes: You mean, you did that ON PURPOSE? Why on earth would you do that?

And I admit I find it hard to explain. But let me try. A few months ago, I stopped blogging. I was in a shitty mood for all kinds of reasons that I did not care to elaborate on in public (and I will say more about this topic because it relates to WoolfCamp and to the discussions we had about who our audience is and how much to tell and how much to hold back, and also to a discussion we didn't get to fit in, about multiple identities - I think it will be a theme in the near future), and since I felt I couldn't blog the things that were on my mind, there was really no point to blogging at all.

Ex abundantia cordis os loquitur. You speak of the things that fill your heart.

So my blog was quiet for a while. And of course I missed it within a week or so, but I still stayed away. I had other things to write in November, and in December I started writing in this blog again - but I didn't want to advertise the fact. And the best way to come back stealthily, I figured, was to turn off the RSS feed. If you insisted on visiting my site, you could still find me, but I assumed that most people would have given up on me by then. And if you were just feed-reading, well ... then you just didn't know. And that was just fine by me.

So ... you ask, still frowning: if you've been back for a couple of months now, why don't you turn it back on?

I just like being under the radar. I've had several people say that they won't read me as often, or not at all, if I don't have a feed. And you know what? That's just fine. I am not into blogging for an increase in my readership. (Actually, that was one of the things I noticed about the New York magazine feature mentioned in Good Morning Silicon Valley: it only speaks to news/tech/political blogs, not to personal blogs at all, and it blandly assumes that we're all blogging to make money and get more and more readers, and that we're frustrated if that doesn't happen.)

If you really miss me, you can always find me. If you don't, not to worry. We can still be friends. Hey, some of my best friends don't read blogs at all! And I love them anyway.

And I really like that my posts don't get announced right on posting. You have to come to me to read me, I don't appear on your doorstep magically. I've had a couple of readers who would comment as soon as a new entry appeared, and I began to find that disturbing - it almost smacked a little bit of stalking, and I found that quite uncomfortable.

Last but not least, it gives me the illusion of owning my blog more, of having it taken back for myself. And while I know that that is an illusion, I still enjoy the feeling.

Comments

Kris

I'm glad you came back to blogging. I look forward to hearing what you have to say...RSS feed, or not!

It was great to meet you at Woolfcamp. Amazing, wasn't it?

Mike

So, now I am checking your blog in the old, slow way every couple days or so. :)

Mary

I understand why you would do this. Woman, take back the blog! I blogged for years without comments or rss or all of that and I sometimes very much miss those days.

Also probably smart not to blog when your heart is full.

minnie

now when i read your words i hear your delightful accent as well! yay!

Elkit

Vot akssent? I heff no akssent!

GraceD

My dear Elke. You were my favorite person at WoolfCamp. Don't tell the others.

Elkit

My lips are sealed. And chocolate-glossed.

anne

aw, it's not stalking, it's LOVE.

i comment early on blogs (not in this case, obviously, because this is catching up!) because i am in a different time zone, and because i don't sleep much, so whenever people post (especially if they post at night in the US), i see it before most others.

i want you to turn on the RSS feed again so that i can see when you have said something new. i think you are being very stubborn and selfish to not think about my wants first! what do you think this is, YOUR blog or something? jeez.

Elkit

anne dear, Stubborn is my middle name. My mother claims the S. is for Sabine, but all my exes know better.

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